FC: Request for help with "Stupid Senate Tricks" article

[Declan McCullagh <declan@well.com>]

Back in 1997, I wrote an article for Time's The Netly News titled "Stupid 
Senate Tricks." Well, the ol'Netly News (complete with spinning cow and 
hand-crafted HTML) is no longer, but the article has managed to stay alive 
through untold AOL Time Warner corporate reshufflings:
http://www.onmagazine.com/on-mag/reviews/article/0,9985,12500,00.html

I wrote about the tech-impaired and otherwise clueless congresscritters who 
inhabit the place known as Washington, DC. An excerpt:
    When Sen. Bob Kerrey (D-Neb.) was asked to define encryption, the
    results were horrific. "Well, I mean, to answer your question, I mean,
    encryption is -- the political equivalent of encryption is you ask me
    a question, I give you an answer and you don't understand it," he
    managed. "I mean, I intentionally garble the answer frequently. I
    intentionally garble the response so that you can't understand what
    I'm saying. And that's -- you notice that I've got the ability to do
    that."

It's time to update that article (the crypto wars are, ah, over), so I'm 
asking for your help. If you've got verifiable stories about congressional 
inanities or bureaucratic stupidities, please send 'em along. Citations to 
news articles, links to transcripts, dates of hearings -- all these are 
great. Personal encounters with Hill denizens? sure. You've got a .gov 
address and want to vent? No prob. Confidentially guaranteed if you want 
it. Obviously any clue-impaired politico is a candidate for inclusion, with 
a focus on folks in Washington.

One I caught recently was the esteemed Sen. Biden of Delaware, trying to 
explain peer-to-peer piracy and (according to the archived video file on 
senate.gov) stumbling over the unfamiliar technology so badly that he ended 
up complaining that illicit programs "were downloaded by websites" and 
confusing software "piracy" with "privacy."

As I did before, I'll give a tip o'the hat to those folks who contributed 
stories and want to be named, and leave out those people who would rather 
remain anonymous and keep their jobs. :)

Deadline is 5 pm ET next Thursday, August 1. Send 'em along!

Thanks,
Declan




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